that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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