His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I have post one night stand depression
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
