dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
