I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
3 2 1 whiskey
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
