I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize