just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
