I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
