brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
