This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
