We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
