Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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