I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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