bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize