I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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