people are starting to question the shark bite story
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I wear drunk well.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize