he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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