Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize