Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
