everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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