Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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