Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize