Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
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