I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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