I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
