Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
