Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize