It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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