I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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