just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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