i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize