Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
