The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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