Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
