Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
