After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
