GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize