You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
