Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
