how can u be prego again
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
