i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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