Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
