JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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