So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
