everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
