She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm like, not good at living.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
