ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize