C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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