Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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