i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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