is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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