Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
