is your mom at the bar?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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