Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We don't watch enough power rangers
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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